How to Replace Bad with Better Behavior: Lessons from My Cat, Zenith

The original title was “Replace Bad with Better Behavior Using Clicker Training.” Why clicker training? Because this post was inspired by my cat, Zenith, and a book about how to clicker train him. I know I’ve got myself one smart cat.

Lessons from a Cat

Zenith the Cat (as I usually call him) is a master of mixed signals. He’ll wake me up with the sweetest meows and cuddles, and just when I’m basking in the love—ouch! If I don’t respond quickly enough, he’ll sink his claws into the bottom of my foot or my calf. Ruthless. My current solution? A cushion. I put it between me and his claws so he can pretend to knead for milk while I protect myself.

What Clicker Training Taught Me About Human Behavior

Why am I not getting mad at him? Because I read in the book that you shouldn’t punish a cat for bad behavior. Instead, you replace it with the behavior you want. That struck me. It made me realize that we’re not equipped to come up with better behavior if we’ve never given it any thought. But here’s the other thing: isn’t that exactly what we need to do for ourselves?

Let’s face it. We don’t. We are experts at beating ourselves down. We’re so quick to punish ourselves for every little mistake, every perceived failure. We let those negative stories—I’m not good enough, I’ll never get it right—claw at us. But what if we stopped? What if, instead of beating ourselves up, we replaced those stories with better ones?

It’s Time to Listen to Our Inner Voices

If we want to work on our goals and dreams, it’s important to start listening to our inner voices. We have many, each with a different purpose. One could argue that we can understand a cat, who meows instead of talking human language, but we all know they have their way of making us aware of what they want. Like the message: Get up, Human. I want attention and I want food, and I want it now!

The voice that tells us what we want often stems from the inner kid. They tell us what they want and need in the moment, and our first response? Dismiss it. Ignore it. It’s not until it gets louder—possibly reinforced by some other voices, the ones of reason—that we may start to listen.

The Voice of Reason: Our Future Best Self

Let’s talk for a moment about that voice of reason. This is most likely our best self. When I talk about our future best selves, I’m talking about this voice—the one that knows what we need. Chances are, we haven’t accepted it yet. Hence, the future best self.

Have you ever thought about what your future best self needs from you in order to become that future best self? First of all, it needs to be acknowledged. Second, it needs you to start acting toward what you are being shown, whether with thoughts or feelings. This is where our inner child shows up best, since they are deeply connected to our inner feelings.

Thinking about behavior that we would like to develop means thinking about what we want and need now and also in the (near and further) future. What would they say is good for you? More importantly, what would our future best self thank us for?

What Will Our Future Self Thank Us For?

Remember what I said about us putting ourselves down so easily? Would our future self thank us for this? That would mean we, somehow, would benefit in the future from this behavior. It would mean that breaking ourselves down would help us build ourselves up. Something is wrong with that picture, wouldn’t you say so too?

The question is: what would change for you if you started listening to both of them today? Because they already have the answers.

It All Starts with What We Believe About Ourselves

What helps us move forward is improving our habits, and in order to do so (consistently), we need to work on our beliefs. The last couple of months, I have been working on Rewriting Your Inner Story. Both the inner child and our future best self play a huge role in it. But the number one character in all of this? That’s YOU. The PRESENT you. Do you consider yourself good enough to actually not just dream, but more importantly, work toward your dreams?

It Can Be Done!

The good news? It can be done. I know because I am living proof. Apart from me, so is my cat, Zenith. Being his third owner within the first year of his life, I was told one thing about him and experienced another. One of these things was that he could walk with a harness. I’ll leave the entire story for another time, but I had to teach him that he could actually walk with one. This involved showing him that he could eat with the harness on. It also meant showing Zenith that he could actually walk up to his dinner tray.

Most people don’t have the patience to train their cat this. Let alone take the time to train themselves to do something unknown, scary, and counterintuitive.

Spending Time and Effort on Ourselves

What would it be like if we were to take the time to improve our own habits instead of quitting when it doesn’t work out straight away? What if we worked on improving the bond we have with ourselves, just like we invest in the bond with our kids and our pets? Let’s take it even one step further. How about if we started listening to our own inner kid? What if, from there, we also started listening and consulting with our best future self? What would change for you?

Start TODAY: Challenge Yourself with Rewriting Your Inner Story

In my latest YouTube videos, I talk a lot about the importance of Rewriting Your Inner Story. If you’d like to know more about this, check out my YouTube video “7 Ways to Replace Bad with Better Behavior (Using Clicker Training)” => You can watch it here <=. Or even better, make the decision to work on yourself by registering for my free Rewrite Your Inner Story Challenge and show yourself right now that you are worth fighting for and being appreciated by YOU! If you want to sign up, please go to => Rewrite Your Inner Story Challenge <=. Now, let’s take that right action!